Sitting here, me and the cat,
She’s all scrunched up taking a nap.
All she does is eat and sleep,
Laying there without a peep.

Purring! That’s an odd old sound,
Wonder if this one’s ready for the pound?
Paw paws, can you imagine that.
Quit it, you old damn cat!

Wonder why women like these things?
They don’t fetch papers nor do they sing.
Then there’s what you call a litter box,
Which smells worse than dirty socks.

I don’t understand, please explain,
Why must I have to sit with this thing?
Is this some kind of stupid old test
To find out which man loves you the best?

Well, maybe this one I should pass,
Just like she did with her gas.
Sitting here, just me and the cat,
She’s all scrunched up taking a nap.